Skip to main content

Excerpt: No Hope For Gomez by Graham Parke


Blog entry: Saturday. Decided to do a little detective work. Headed over to the hospital and queued up at the front desk to ask about visitor’s hours. The nurse told me they’d just started.
“Great,” I said. “Can I just walk in?”
“You can,” she said. “Who did you want to see?”
“A Mr. Miller. Mr. Joseph Miller. He was brought in two days ago.”
The nurse consulted her computer, frowned, then shook her head. “No, I’m sorry,” she said. “Mr. Miller’s dead. He died late last night.” She looked up from her screen. “Would you like to see somebody else?”
“What? No! I really need to talk to Mr. Miller. Are you absolutely sure he’s passed away?”
“I can recheck if you want.” She typed away. “Sometimes this program mixes up some of the… ah, I see what I’ve done now.” She gave me an apologetic smile. “Stupid little me,” she said. “I had the stats of several files mixed up.”
I breathed a sigh of relief. “So, he didn’t pass away?”
“Oh, no,” the nurse said, shaking her head, “he’s still dead, but he died this morning rather than last night.” She held up her hand with a small amount of space between her thumb and index finger. “You missed him by that much.”
“I see,” I said. “Does it at least say what he died of?”
She browsed her screen, bit her lip, and mumbled, “Yes, no, wait a minute. I saw something about…. Ah, yes. Yes, it does.” She looked up again. For a long moment we stared at each other. When I finally arched an eyebrow, she said, “Are you a relative? I’m not supposed to give out this kind of information to just anybody.”
I tried to think fast. I really needed that information but I didn’t know Joseph other than from the clinic waiting area. We’d never even spoken. Then, out of nowhere, the perfect answer just came to me. I told her, “Yes.”
“Okay then.” She was about to tell me when her face clouded over again. “You really should be getting this information from his doctor, though.”
I waved it away, told her it would be fine.
“Well,” she said, reading from her screen, “it says here he died of dehydration and malnutrition.”
“He was found passed out in his apartment,” I told her. “Apparently he’d been out for a while. Does it say what caused him to lose consciousness in the first place?”
The nurse perused the file for a long time, then shook her head. “No, sorry,” she said. “I’ll have to get the doctor for that. Just a moment.” She reached for the phone.
“That’s okay,” I said. I didn’t want to get into trouble for impersonating a relative. “I need to go. Pressed for time. Thank you.”
As I turned to leave, she called after me, “Are you sure you don’t want to visit anyone else? There are some really nice people up on the second floor. Much nicer than Mr. Miller. They’d love to talk to you.”


More about Graham Parke and his works, visit his website.





Where To Buy:

No Hope for Gomez! is available from Barnes & Noble at a reduced price for a limited time.

Amazon link for purchase.


Early reviews:
“Extremely witty and clever writing that contains keen insights into human nature.”
-- California Chronicle

“A very funny book; a veritable page turner of nonstop laughs. Buy a copy and find out for yourself!”
-- Reader Views

"A quick and unputdownable read that flies in the face of reason, and smashes against the wall of detective novels. It's a Coens Brothers' film formatted in book form."
-- BookReview.com


Comments

  1. Looks really cool, although I might be a little biased...

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have to agree with G. Parke that it does sound cool, even if he is biased!!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Comments are for Google Users Only due to spam comments. Thank you for taking the time to leave your opinions and comments.

Popular posts from this blog

Dr. Suess' The Grinch (With #Giveaway)

AVAILABLE FEBRUARY 5TH!
RATED PG
86 minutes
AMAZON US

Illumination and Universal Pictures present The Grinch, based on Dr. Seuss' beloved classic. The Grinch tells the story of a cynical grump who goes on a mission to steal Christmas, only to have his heart changed by a young girl’s generous spirit. Funny, heartwarming and visually stunning, The Grinch is fun for the whole family!



REVIEW:
Such great animation!
There was always something going on in this movie. Even though it was a story I have seen played out a million times and a million different ways, they all are different too. This had more of a story. It was very magical and is definitely fun for the whole family.
Want to point out, Max, the dog, stole the show for me. He is so adorable, even if animation. Such a good dog.
This is one of those Christmas movies that you really can enjoy all year round. It has enough laughs, fun and morals to be played anytime. Plus there is nothing wrong with Christmas cheer in February.


4.5/5



WANNA WIN…

#Win The Secret Life Of Pets 2 (US/CDN)

AVAILABLE AUGUST 27!
Rated PG
173 minutes
AMAZON
The Secret Life of Pets 2 explores the emotional lives of our pets, the deep bond between them, the families that love them and answers the question: What are your pets really doing when you’re not at home? Terrier Max (Patton Oswalt) is coping with major life changes after Katie’s marriage and the arrival of a toddler. Meanwhile, Gidget (Jenny Slate) tries to rescue Max’s favourite toy from a cat-packed apartment with a little help from her feline friend, Chloe (Lake Bell), who has discovered the joys of catnip. And Snowball (Kevin Hart) gets delusions of grandeur that he’s a superhero after his owner starts dressing him in superhero pajamas. But when Daisy (Tiffany Haddish), a fearless Shih Tzu, shows up to ask for Snowball’s help on a dangerous mission, he’ll have to summon the courage to become the hero he’s been pretending to be.Can Max, Snowball, Gidget and the rest of the gang find the inner courage to face their biggest fears?


REVIEW…

#ChristmasInJuly #Win A Onesie Or Pajamas Of Your Choice! (US/CDN)

The most wonderful time of the year is back, (a little early)! It's Christmas in July!! You too can celebrate with a wonderful gift right here. UglyChristmasSweater.com has the funniest, traditional and branded goodies on the planet! Here is a sneak peek at a couple of things I personally love on their site.

Last year, I reviewed one of the sweaters. You can view that post here. It is easily my favorite holiday sweater. It's so warm and I love the quality of it. This year, I was asked if I wanted a onesie or pajamas to check out. You know I had to jump at the chance, knowing what great quality clothing they have.

I got the Grinch on my onesie! I got an extra large size, and before you go crazy knowing that is big for me, I don't like my pjs to be tight and constricting. I always go a size up on my night clothes. I must have been traumatized in a past life.... These Grinch pajamas are soooooo soft and comfortable. The best part is that it's A/C season so I can actually wher…